This is going to be a long post, where shall I start? I guess I will start in lower primary. Fresh out of kindergarten, where I had scored well for my tests always, primary school was going to be a big jump. I was enlisted in Maha Bodhi primary school, nearby my house at Ubi at the time, which was known for their focus on Chinese. Primary one whizzed by and I still fared decently, but the long descent of my academics started from about the primary two mark, if memory serves me correctly. The standard of Chinese was way beyond me, and my English speaking background just couldn't make the cut. I don't remember the marks I got for Chinese tests and exams in my lower primary days but I think it's safe to say they were borderline passes at best. Come upper primary, I had shifted to Hougang, where I still reside today. I smelt fresh air as I finally had the chance to leave a school which was heavily focused on where I seriously lacked proficiency. Hougang Primary was to be the school that saw me all the way from primary four to six. I got rather interested in science in my days at Hougang Primary, although perhaps regrettably I didn't pursue an academic track that would have continued cultivating that interest.
Next up was secondary school. With a less than decent PSLE T-Score, I filled my choices up and come results announcement day, I had been posted to Monfort Secondary to my utmost horror. Indeed, why would I be horrified when I was the one who put the choice there himself? It was a combination of being in a unisex environment and the stories of strict discipline that Monfort had about it, things which I never considered as I never put much thought while I was picking schools. I guess that is something I will always regret somewhat; not seriously considering the implications of my actions as I was younger. I never really studied as hard as I should have, if I even studied at all. My story in secondary school was no different, I basically flunk math and had borderline passes for all other subjects less English. The stakes got higher each time, since ultimately it would mean whether one gets to study in a local university or not, which in a Singaporean context is of utmost importance. So, secondary school was lots of fooling around, doing absurd things in the name of fun and hell, it was fun. There were really memorable times in secondary school, all the fights, crushes I had, and my short-lived but honestly good experiences I had in joining the Scouts Association as my CCA. Come secondary four, when everyone was studying hard and doing Ten Year Series from dusk till dawn, I was fooling around. I can barely even remember what I was doing when I should have been studying, but my guess now is probably on games such as MapleStory and Priston Tale. So came the GCE O Levels, which I scored abysmally for. I absolutely did not get into a Polytechnic course of my choosing and was placed there in what I guess was surplus places for a course that needed filling up.
Life at Nanyang Polytechnic starts, and I was going to be studying manufacturing engineering. Immediately, my lack of concern towards study showed. I attended classes regularly till after the first month or so, where I had somehow convinced myself from what I heard from my friends at other Polytechnics that my poly days should be spent at their Polytechnics instead. I yearned to be at Republic Polytechnic with their super swanky campus and loads of hot chicks, and for that reason plus a few other minor quibbles (which didn't seem minor to me at the time), I dropped out of Nanyang Polytechnic with barely a plan as to what I was going to do after that. Seventeen years, and I had managed to destroy a good bit of my future prospects already. I entered private courses after dropping out of Nanyang Polytechnic, and once again, didn't take it seriously. Borderline scores all over again.
9th December, 2009. I was about to experience something totally different. Weary from waking up so early in the morning, I trudged off to Keat Hong camp where I would reside for the next two years. I had come to that stage in life where every male in Singapore has to go through, and that is National Service. We were to go to the parade square of Keat Hong camp to surrender our pink ICs, and adopt the 11B which would be our identification card for the next two years. It was symbolic as holding the 11B meant a loss of many freedoms. I regret not having kept my thoughts online in a private blog during my NS days as I did quite a lot of writing during the two years. After all, we had so much free time on our hands. Fortunately, most of it is preserved in physical writing so I guess that counts for something. Writing something in the present and then reading it in future and writing about the past is so different. Hindsight is 20/20 after all, and we tend to critically review ourselves as we write about past events. That's perhaps the biggest regret as to why I keep more thoughts online during my NS days as I can never write as I would have back then right now. Still, reading this article which I found while searching for my unit really brings about a sense of nostalgia. While 7th mono wasn't my batch, most of the experiences written there are things that I can relate to.
Army was instrumental in my journey towards banishing mediocrity. It was something in army that brought about the desire. Being forced to push yourself, whether you liked it or not, to achieve something bigger than yourself. One is constantly faced with such a situation in the army, and it will expand your horizons. I made a pact with myself to be a better man after the two years, but when I first started the pact I had no idea how, I just hoped I would be better. Well, the army had a way of teaching me that. Through all the scoldings and the strict discipline which noone would've liked, I actually found myself improving, physically, mentally and spiritually. Physically, I was actually beginning to develop muscles. I had been a scrawny pole most of the first 17 years of my life besides the time I was a baby. I was forming visible pecs through all the IPPTs, strength training, morning runs and tactical marches that we had on a weekly basis. My body was responding in a very reactive way, since I've seen people that basically had no changes to their body even after all these activities. I actually started to enjoy the army come the second year. Sure, outfield will always be a pain in the ass, but getting to used to such a lifestyle wasn't so bad at all. Our biggest worry of the week was where to club after we booked out, or where to go during nights out. Long discussions were held on the differences between two brands of vodka, as well as any behaviors caught while we were getting piss drunk at Zouk. These were meaningful, interesting and engaging conversations which one would mock as an adult working in a corporate setting. I picked up gymming too, during February of my second year, during Chinese New Year, as I precisely recall. There was a nights out during the week of Chinese New Year and I went to the gym with my section instead of heading out of camp. Since then, I've never looked back. We had perhaps 10 field camps a year in both our years at 40 SAR. Through all the suffering, I was actually becoming a better man. I had the what in mind, Army had taught me the how. And for that, I must say my army experience was a good one. I have so many fond memories of the times we spent overnight in the M113, which was our third home, after the bunk and my actual house. Sometimes it poured while we were in the tank, and we had those discussions about what we'd do after we ORDed, a conversation I'm sure every NSF will have. When the right mood and the right topic of conversation coincides though, plus a good setting such as in the middle of the night in the nether regions of Singapore (Lim Chu Kang/Jalan Bahtehra etc.), that's a conversation one remembers for decades.
Through all the weapon and vehicle cleanings that lasted 4am into the mornings, the different sorts of guard duties (normal camp patrol and 4NTM), the battalion inspections, the trips to Australia for Exercise Wallaby and the constant surprises from our most unpredictable Sergeant Major, we were growing to become better people. Once gangsters and juveniles and young punks, we stepped out of Keat Hong camp one last time as men with great drive and ambition. Just as quickly as it started, our army days came to an end, what seemed like eternity now passed in the blink of an eye once it was a past event. Just as we formed up at the parade square of 40 SAR Keat Hong camp on the day of our enlistment, we did a slow march toward the podium and off the parade square on the day of our ORD parade. A fitting end to our NS journey.
I just came here to write about my army days in this post because I honestly miss it at times, and now is one of those times. The rest of the post about primary school was all to provide setting and context. There are times when you're out in corporate world where you'll miss everything else you've done in your life which goal isn't to earn money. The day I enlisted, I felt nothing but dread as I thought my life was to be a living hell for the next two years. It's ironic really that now I've dedicated such a lengthy post to something I once dreaded so much. On that note, we've come to the end of this post and I shall end with saying something that the army has taught me. "There is suffering to be had in growing but it'll ultimately be worth it."
